The following are questions I may be asking during our introductory interview. It’s a good idea to have at least looked over the list and have your answers in mind when we get together. You certainly may write out your answers beforehand if you prefer the chance to edit and revise. Otherwise, I’ll just be taking copious notes from which I will eventually write your one-of-a-kind ceremony.
Questions for your ceremony:
1) How did the two of you meet?
2) How long have you been together? Has that been continuous?
3) Have you had any humorous/notable/romantic dates you’d care to recount?
4) What attracted you to one another?
5) What does each of you love most about the other?
6) What traits or interests do you have in common?
7) In what ways do you or your tastes differ?
8) Why have you chosen to make things official and get married/Pinky Sworn?
9) What do you think is the most important aspect of a marriage/commitment?
10) Has anyone ever given you sage advice you intend to try and follow as you build your lives together? If so, what was it and why does it resonate with you?
11) Is there anyone you’d like to acknowledge or include (metaphorically speaking) in your ceremony that couldn’t be there, either due to geography or their no longer being alive?
12) Tell me about your proposal.
13) What are your plans for your future?
14) What THREE things do you each pledge to each other? (These can be serious, such as “to always listen first and speak later,” or funny, such as “to always tell you your cooking is wonderful even when it isn’t.”)
15) Do you plan to have anyone speak/read/sing or play at the ceremony? If so, who and what?
16) Would you like to have a ring warming as part of your ceremony? This is where we pass your wedding rings among your guests (or just the immediate family members in the audience) and have each in turn hold the rings and imbue them with their best wishes for you. It can be nice to make people feel involved and can be done while someone sings or plays a song.
17) Do you plan to have any ritual such as lighting a unity candle?
18) Will you write your own vows or do a call-and-response, wherein I say, “Repeat after me…”? Or both?
19) Will you be taking your husband’s/wife’s last name? How would you like to be announced at the end? (“I joyously introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. XYZ.”)
20) Would you like to change the verbiage from “I take you to be my wife/husband” to “I choose you…” or “I give myself to you”?
21) Would you like to include any anecdotes from wedding party members or members of your families, reflecting on you as a couple?
22) Have you any symbols that mean a great deal to you? Maybe an extended metaphor? (“The bumps in my head fit the holes in his.”) J
23) Anything else that comes to mind that you’d like to include?